is gone for months out of the year and you still find yourself being happier and at ease when he is there that's not good. I recommend couples therapy. If he's not willing to do that (which speaks volumes), at least find a therapist for one-on-one sessions. It'll help you sort through your feelings plus, being alone w/no family around, I can imagine you feel lonely. It be a great place to vent. It just sounds like you resent your husband for leaving you to fend for yourself, raising a kid in a place that you have no relatives. Also, you mentioned that he's not involved with you and your but, c'mon, by the sounds of it, you're not that involved in his life either. You don't make an effort, he doesn't make an effort (though it's sad as hell that the kid has to suffer and basiy be caught in the middle of it). If he's a deadbeat dad, how can be kind, sensitive, caring, and loving at the same time? This is what makes me think you're resentful of him and the time he spends away from home rather than him being a straight up jerk. Observer also mentioned it but I, too, immediately thought you were a military fam when I read your post. If so, you're lucky in that there are tons of resources for military spouses in your situation. No one can answer if it's time for you to move on. That's one you're gonna have to figure out all on your own.