a traditional college. You are much more employable and you don't start life off tens of thousands Cool Ridge of dollars in the you not get a decent job for quite a while. I am a college educated scientist and if I could do it all over, I would have gone to a local technical high school to study plumbing or carpentry. Dont believe me. How 19yo olds that you know make $45 an hour? that went to trade schools used to be laughed at when I was a. Guess who is laughing now .. I just found out that the sheriff was ed for domestic disturbance to the apartment of my ex and his (pregnant) newlywed wife (they got hitched last Thursday) while our were in his custody (they are 10 and 8). A recount of the events by my, overheard as he was confiding in his best friend, included statements like "their worst fight yet", "the sheriff came because of all the yelling and crying and the 'help-me's'", and "I asked my dad if he was going to get arrested". This clearly leads me to think that this is an ongoing situation (plus the fact that he was verbally/abusive to me, which is the reason I left him, so it's not surprising). I am very concerned about my getting raised in a toxic and emotionally unsafe environment that is only teaching them horribly wrong things about what a relationship should be. There are also concerns about pot-smoking and excessive drinking (numerous witnesses can testify to his substance problem and a test would substantiate that). We have had a schedule for the past 6 years at my request (I strive for fairness), but now I really believe it is far from being in the -' best interest to continue having such a large share of visitation time with their father, because they are around verbal/emotional again, and quite frankly I don't trust him not to lose control with them either. Does that seem like a valid reason to request reduced visitation? I would want him to have only one overnight during the week and every other weekend until he can prove that he's taking steps to end the patterns of (substance and domestic), or something. I truly hate the thought that they not understand having less time with their dad, but I am also adamant about the fact that the more time they spend with him the more they get desensitized to horribly dysfunctional behavior they end up mimicking, on top of being at risk of getting victimized by him too. I welcome any constructive feedback, advice on how to proceed, local resources to help the cope, etc. Trolls be passively despised and actively ignored.