You cannot possibly leave your daughters with that as their childhood legacy. You KNOW how difficult it is to overcome childhood tragedy. Put those thoughts aside. I've sorta been in your wife's shoes. The sex was lacking Beautiful housewives want sex tonight Pawtucket Rhode Island in our marriage too not for the same reasons. But while I didn't know that there was a physical REASON for his lack of sex drive, it was the source of angst and discontent and nearly ruined our marriage. It was only because I was determined to address the cause that we discovered my husband actually was ill. Anyway, all kinds of things went thru my head, including seeking sex outside of our marriage which floored and enraged my husband too. But really, what is the answer for her? She loves you, wants to remain married to you, but you are forcing her to be celibate which is not who she is or prepared to be. How years is she supposed to just sit and wait and? How is she supposed to ignore her very basic, human, needs? especially when you've decided that you aren't interested in making it better? You aren't being fair to her. You are bsiy saying: Shut your needs off because I'm not willing to fulfill them, and I'm not going to let you fulfill them elsewhere. Yes, I know there are a lot of emotional scars you. But she is now carrying some too. Not nearly as tragic, but I'm certain she has layed awake in bed, crying, because she isn't desired by her husband. I'm sure there have been times when she has felt ugly, rejected, incomplete and hurt. don't you think its time to find a GOOD therapist, who can help you? You've already sacrificed your childhood years to this abuser are you willing to give him your adult years and marriage, and family, and your life?