Speaking as a 50 year old who has spent 25 years learning to DESPISE myself for certain things I did that HURT someone, and xxx wife want dating who would sell his soul to the devil for the to undo that hurt if he is serious about wanting you back, I mean, honest-to-God, through and through, balls to bones SERIOUS, then he can wait. You need to tell him that there be something in the future but that you need to be as sure as he seems to be. He was immature when he did that to you. Boys (NOT men, just boys) have this asinine thing about "bros before ho's", and he wasn't strong / smart / old enough to escape that trap. Maybe he's mature enough now, but if he is, a little more maturity won't hurt him.. as regards your weight, please consider this quote from "V for Vendetta", whose title character wears a mask: "There is a face beneath this mask, but it's not me. I'm no more that face than I am the muscles beneath it, or the bones beneath them." In other words, you are not a "fat". You are a spirit trapped in the material world. (still quoting from V for Vendetta) Our integrity sells for so little, but it is all we really have. It is the very last inch of us, but within that inch, we are free. An inch It is small, and fragile, and it is the only thing in the world worth having. We must never lose it or give it away. We must never let them take it from us. I that, whoever you are, you escape this place. I that the world turns and things get better. But I most of all that you understand that even though I never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I you. With all my heart, I you." Now, breathe, girlfriend. BREATHE.